Lose

Actually it's rather funny.
I don't know why I was so sure, but it's probably also right.

It's just funny on how I've been all over him for years, asking for prove to keep me away from him.
Things happened now and I think... this is the answer?
It's just weird why I suddenly decide this is the answer.

People be saying there are still lots of fished on the sea,
They are right, but also...
I don't know.

It's been long and falling in love to him feel safe, feels right.
It was okay, I was okay with the concept of him.

The thought of me falling in love with someone else has always scare me,
No matter how much I'd like to fall in love, falling in love somehow scare me.

I don't want to fall in love to the wrong person....
To the point that it might be better to never fall in love at all
But fall in love is... a serenity of happiness for me.

I want to fall in love again but if it's not him... I'm scared.
I'm scared of fall in love toward the wrong person.

God, please don't let me stupidly fall in love toward the wrong person... anymore.
I'm so scared... now that the love has lose.

There was Once Love Between Us

Or so I thought?
Probably, it actually never exist at all
And what happened between us
Was just mere dream of a blink eyes and light darken

[Heart Quake]

Darling the world might be death
But not my word, not the heart, not ever
So if you ever see me at the crossroad
I hope I'll be smiling toward you
And I'll silently wish you smile back toward me
For my heart used to beat fast when I see you
But darling,
It's my word that haven't died
How about yours?

If Ever

I'd like to see into your eyes
and say
I love you

M.U.T.E.D.

Sometimes I just wanted to mute the word
So nobody can speak to me or through me
Because I just don't care

But then come times where I wanted to be listened
And then, only then,
I wondered why the word mute existed

[unhours]

Or do they see me?
But the hours changed and minute turned
Leaving the second wondering as the clock ticking
Or do they see you?

Foreshadow

It was the rain which falls down through the eyes
The children thought that it was dewdrops and enjoyed the freshness
Eyes open and search for the sunlight

I found you

And now, lets fall in love all over again

Forgotten

I was just lying there beside you
But, I guess, the sun up there shine brighter
For you keep looking at it and never at me
Such an irony though
Because, you are my sun

[Talk]

I seriously really want to talk to you
At midnight, on the lonely hour like now
The serious question is...
Do you want to talk to me?

Thankful

God, I'm sorry for I often forget

To be thankful for one irreplaceable talent

It's to fall in love and to love

Not everyone, nowaday, able to feel such feelings

Love Like You

I spelled the mantra
But when I open my eyes
You weren't there
I am strong and this mantra should've worked
But, you're still nowhere I could notice
Must it a good sign
Or was it a misfortune?
A condition where God can only tell
I guess

To and Through

I raised my eyes
And so do you
We looked at each other
Or so I thought
As I stare to you
But you stare through me

Fall to You Without Thinking

If I were to be asked
What was the easiest things ever happened to you?
The answer is obvious
Fall in love to you was the easiest

And somehow, I'd like it to be happen, again and again.

My Heart Stopped when I Saw You

But then I remembered
My heart was already dead
Why would it came back to life?

It didn't
It just... eternally died.

A First Day Without You

Do you remember the last rain that pouring down, marked that spring has come to end? The riots thunder roaring through the dark night and there seems to be nonstopping. But the night goes through and the rain drizzling. And through the dark night, through the tumbling lightning, I know that outside, once the rain slow down, stars sparkling up and moon shines it's way. In that chaos moment, I saw you as the candle that light up my night. As I carefully try to cover the light from the whispering wind.

Do you remember, a year come to end and another drizzling rain start to pour down? That time, I also thought that, "Ahh, that's it. This spring has again come to end". And I remember as i sit down on the long bench with heart full of hopes. Waiting for my summer sun to shine. But then again, through the calming rain of the end of spring, I saw my candle lighting up my dim night. For a moment, I was sure that this will go through.

Do you remember, when the year again come to an end, marking an upcoming hellish summer. Through that night, I remember seeing you standing on the stage. As I hold my tears up, as I put my hearts toward other. As I wish that the candle's fire will burn my memories of you. But you come with another candle, knowing that mine is slowly gone. I thought that you'll give it to someone else, and I never feel so blessed, as you offer it to me.

Another spring now has come, and the summer is yet to begin. The passing years make me realize, how every time different things happened, and I can't predicted of what yet will come. So, this year again, I'm still holding up my candle, slowly blowing off. Whenever I see it, i think, that whenever the time will come of it to die, I'll just buy myself a new one. But, as i can't ever predicted the upcoming summer, a little bit of pieces on my heart, hope that you will again give me yours, once again.

But, I guess this year will be different.

And I don't know how much you can hear my whisper.

But, I missed you. I wish you know, I hope you'll know.

For those who have been my candle for three years, lighting up my dim night, thank you. However the way I will get my new candle, either it's from you, a candle that I bought myself, or if someone offer up a better candle, I hope, I wish, I will be able to receive it full heartedly.

I Miss You

Closing the Book

You know
The thing about closing a good book is
It's really hard no matter how you try
Your mind will still trying to remember
Every pages
Every words
Every mesmerizing moments
And when the time finally come
For you to realize that somethings are meant to left behind
It'll be the hardest thing to do

The thing is, i don't know whether you are a good book or not?
I just love reading books

But it's ok
I'll find another good book
Though i won't completely forget you

Sincerely,

You've made my years full

Who am I?

Every now and then
Everytime I thought I see you
I missed smiling
I missed sitting down there and see you staring at me
And then you smile
It remind me of the day where we talked nonstop
Every night and every ticking clock
I missed you my sky
My Icarus
If only you wont burnt when you're close to me

A Proud Winner of Camp NaNoWriMo

And I'm proudly to announce that my Camp NaNoWriMo word count has hit it's WINNER!
YATTAAA!
So happy to know that I finally finish this long project I've already had for years! *sobs*
No, actually, it haven't finished yet X'D but at least, i hit my word goal.

So, please be patient and wait for my work will be posted at Wattpad! Please read my work *bow*

It was such a long hard and rough journey, but finally, i hit finish.
There are still thing to be fixed, and the fact that this work haven't actually quite reach their ending yet. But, I'm sure that it'll slowly reach their goal aaanddd see the light of the day!

I hope that you guys will be able to enjoy my work at my Wattpad.

NaNoWriMo

Hi for everyone who read my blog (which I don't even know if you guys exist or not, anyway, HI!)!
First of all, sorry that lately, i don't really update anymore.
The reason is, as you can see on the banner above, I finally participated on Camp NaNoWriMo!
NaNoWriMo is short from National Novel Writing Month. It's actually, usually happen at November. But, to gear up toward the November Writing Month, NaNoWrimo has Camp NaNoWriMo during April and July.

What's different is, at NaNoWriMo, you must write toward your goal, which is 50k words to be considered as a winner. Of course, either you reached it or not, you'll still be a winner for all the words you've written.

But at camp, you set your own goal! It doesn't have to be 50k word written for you to be considered as winner at camp. But, nevertheless, all that matter is the words that you've already written.

So, if any of you guys, read this and interested with NaNoWriMo's program, just go and check nanowrimo.org. They have answered any question that you probably have right now.

So, while at that, please kindly check my wattpad to read more of my writing! You can read it here.

That's it for now. I hope you guys will interested in writing (and reading) because of this post. Thanks for reading my post~

Sunyi Senyap

Bernafas
Segar dan bersihnya udara musim dingin
Aku bermimpi tentang sebuah dunia dalam tidur lelap
Salju berjatuhan anggunnya
Bahagia dalam pesona musim dingin
Aku tak sabar
Aku tak sabar

Membeku
Orang-orang berkumpul mengelilingi api
Aku bisa merasakan kehangatan dalam dingin
Embun beku  terang menyelimuti pohon-pohon
Memantulkan keperakan malam
Aku tak sabar
Aku tak sabar

Kuharap salju akan turun secepatnya
Di semua tempat
Seluruh dunia ditudungi putih
Mengulang diriku untuk menghadapi musim baru
Sekali lagi

Jatuh dan jatuh salju-salju
Seperti berlian dari langit

Patah hatiku – dilukis putih
Mengarahkan kita ke negeri ajaib
Seputih salju – putih suci
Awal baru

Lalu kuharap salju akan turun secepatnya
Di semua tempat
Seluruh dunia ditudungi putih
Mengulang diriku untuk menghadapi musim baru
Sekali lagi

Originally White Song by Hyde. Lyrics translated by me, so please credit me if you're quoting this. Thank you.

Please be noticed that the translation MIGHT NOT be EXACT. The reason is because i tried to make it sounds more poetic or rhymed in Indonesian. For example, White Song is of course, not "Sunyi Senyap" in Indonesian. I admit the translation of "White Song" to "Sunyi Senyap" was because I'm confused between the term white song and white noise. But since it sounds more poetic than the original translation which is "Lagu Putih", i decided to put it that way. Thank you for your notice.